“We’re not worthy.”

                                                                                                     Wayne Campbell and Garth Alger                                                                                                                         Wayne’s World (1992)

This week we’ve passed the “heavy lifting” for our blog on to Dr. Kelly Flanagan, a practicing clinical psychologist with his own blog, UnTangled, who has written a book called Loveable.

During my run/walk workout last Saturday morning I listened to a podcast from Success Talks in which Dr. Flanagan was interviewed. He shared his thoughts, outlined in the book, on worthiness, belonging and purpose.

I have listened to several different podcasts during my morning workouts over the years, but I have to say this is one of the best I have ever heard. So I wanted to share it with you. I assure you that this 38-minute interview is well worth your time.

As you listen, one of the things you will learn is that we all have a false self or a persona, designed to protect our true self. Why is this? It turns out that the false self is created to present what we perceive to be a more acceptable version of ourselves.

However, now that we are past high school, college and maybe even the workplace, might I suggest that now is the time for you to shed your false self and embrace your truest, most authentic self. There is no need to impress others at this stage in life. You are free to be the true you now more than ever.

You will also hear Dr. Flanagan talk about the many decisions we make in our lives, especially the ones that determine the lifestyle we lead. He asks us to consider the motivation behind these life decisions: Are these decisions made to prove our worth or to express our worth?

So often it is to prove ourselves. But Dr. Flanagan suggests we ask ourselves, “If I had nothing left to prove, how would I live my life?” For our purposes here, I ask you change the last part of the question slightly to ask yourself more directly, “How would I live my retired life?” That is to say, the retired life with no regrets and the retired life you are worthy of leading. You might be surprised by what you discover when you look at retirement this way.


Success Talks Podcast with Dr. Kelly Flanagan

Gary A. Weuve, CFP®
Founder and CEO

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